How I Learned to Actually Feel Financially Secure

For years, I did everything right.

I invested consistently, watched my portfolio grow, and hit financial milestones I hadn't expected to reach so quickly. By any objective measure, I was in a strong financial position. And I still felt anxious about money. The same worry I'd had when I was paying off student loans after college was still there, unchanged, even as my net worth kept climbing.

The Accidental Foundation

I graduated college with around $30,000 of student loans and paid them off as fast as I could. It felt like the responsible and correct approach. It wasn't. Once I understood investing, I realized I had cost myself $5,000 by prioritizing paying down my debt over investing. At the time, I didn't have the framework to know the difference.

I spent most of my twenties working in nonprofits and mental health, and never prioritized maximizing my salary. I also didn't know much about personal finance beyond the vague sense that saving for retirement was good and investing was something you were supposed to do.

The turning point was accidental. I had been saving up cash because I was planning to go to grad school. Then I got rejected. I started applying to new jobs instead and got a significant raise just as COVID hit, which meant there was nowhere to spend money anyways. I suddenly had more cash than I had a plan for.

I decided to figure it out. I started reading about personal finance: index fund investing, tax strategy, account prioritization. I started investing aggressively and looked forward to buying index funds with every paycheck.

The Part I Didn't Expect

For a few years I just kept going. My portfolio kept growing. And the anxiety didn't change.

As a data scientist, I eventually framed it this way: my brain hadn't received any new training data. I had updated my portfolio, but not my mental model. A growing number on a screen doesn't automatically change how money feels day to day.

The financial security was real. I just didn't know what it meant yet.

Giving My Brain New Data

The insight didn't come all at once. Gradually, I started to understand what my financial position actually meant. Not as a number, but as a set of real choices.

I knew the anxiety wasn't going to fix itself. My brain needed new data, and that meant new experiences. So I took time off. Not a vacation, but an extended period with no job and no immediate plan. I was nervous about it. But it turned out to be a wonderful decision.

Ask any of my college friends, and they'll all tell you I was a night owl with horrible sleep patterns. Within days of quitting my job, I was waking up at 5am without an alarm. I realized that I'm a morning person when I'm excited about what I'm waking up to do.

That experience changed how I thought about money. My portfolio wasn't just a number, but afforded me the power to decide how I wanted to live my life. I had built that without seeing it clearly.

Why I Do This

Long before I started Saver Financial Coaching, I loved helping friends with questions about investing, debt, and how to think about their finances. The analytical side, but also the emotional side that most financial services ignore.

Most of the financial industry isn't designed to make you financially independent. An advisor charging a percentage of your assets makes more money the longer you stay dependent on them. I wanted to build something with different incentives: a program that gives you the framework to understand your own trajectory and manage your own money.

The anxiety I felt for years, even as my financial position kept improving, is something I hear consistently from clients. Physicians, tech workers, and other high performers who are incredibly successful in their careers but still feel uncertain about money. Not sure if they're on track. Not sure what they should actually be doing differently.

It doesn't have to feel that way.

Helping people feel confident about their finances is what I care about most. Feel free to set up a free consultation!